Articles By Claudia
Shag, Marry, or Kill: This game never gets old, but the challenge is coming up with the three choices. For those of you that don’t know this game – when given a choice of three names you MUST say who you would choose to Marry, Shag (well, it’s Fuck really, but we’ll be nice) or Kill. Obviously the harder the choices (and by hard, I mean disgusting, personally offensive, weird, bizarre or otherwise not on your list of shag-able famous people), the better.
I enjoy the elusiveness about the show – the mysterious air/don’t give a damn attitude of the creators, but that being said, last Sunday’s episode left me with a really unsettling feeling…Who am I rooting for? I’m not saying I need a perfect rom com style protagonist, but help a sister out.
But it got me thinking about all of those crushes that take you by surprise. To find Brad Pitt or Ryan Gosling sexy is easy. They are. But when you are attracted to the limping, kind-hearted, pudgy butler on “Downton Abbey” – it definitely take you by surprise. You realize their sexiness is about qualities of character (and their talent at bringing this to screen) than their physical looks. This is why millions of women find Howard Stern sexy.
The other night I was listening to a dear friend agonize about whether or not she should end her relationship of 3 years. This was not the first time we’d had this conversation. This was not even the tenth time we’d had this conversation.
I know we are supposed to all be very “you go girl” about our looks, abilities, bodies, etc. but I have always thought a confident person didn’t need to shout their attributes from the rooftop. To me, the people constantly calling attention to said attributes seemed to lack real confidence since they needed to draw so much attention to it all the time. Maybe I was just raised that a little bit of humility goes a long way. Enter British writer Samantha Brick. On Monday the UK’s Daily Mail published her article “Why Women Hate Me For Being Beautiful: There are Downsides to Being This Pretty.”
It might be no surprise that I have already downloaded and finished reading all three of the “Fifty Shades” books onto my iPad. Are they good? Eh, define good. They are not well-written, but I never thought “The Da Vinci Code” was well-written and that didn’t stop it from being an enjoyable read. However, I find myself recommending this book to my female friends (usually after I’ve had a couple of glasses of wine). Let me explain.
I’m a bartender – at a very busy, packed, meat-market type of bar. This puts me in the interesting position of watching the whole dance between men and women go down each night, over and over and over again, with a lot of jager and beer thrown in to keep it intersting. Every once and a while, I’m thrust into the middle of it all. And for the hundreds of great, normal guys, there are those few bad apples whose level of douchebaggery is astounding.
Soaking: This method occurs when the males’ erect penis is placed inside the female vagina and lays still. This is the soaking process. The dick soak is a spiritual experience, it allows both partners to connect with each other at a deep level without going all the way. For a dick soak to occur the passionately paused penis must not make a single movement in any direction. It must “soak.”
Despite the urging of tons of friends, I already felt guilty about getting sucked into a young adult, poorly written, vampire trilogy. I thought the last thing I needed was a post-apocalyptic, deathmatch trilogy. However, I was wrong. “The Hunger Games” is much better than “Twilight.”
I’ve always been an anglophile. It started with an early introduction to Jane Austen and Miss Marple, but besides the dreary weather, I’d probably be very happy living in London. Moreso these days by what appears to be their new take-no-prisoners, badass feminist attitude towards the plastic surgery/ beauty/ industry. The group UK Feminista is petitioning the British government to end plastic surgery advertising.