We dated the Zeros… so you don’t have to.


Does Love Have a Zip code?


Yesterday Yahoo!’s homepage ran an article entitled ‘Top 10 Cities for Single Women’, which was a follow up to their previous post ‘Top 10 Cities for Single Men’. After reading both articles, I decided that the titles are a little misleading.

The data comes from the housing and real estate market, so basically the information is telling you which city has the most single women, not which city is best for single women.

You know when you’re single and you go to a party and you look around and there are four single women for every guy (most of whom are taken anyway)? A great many parties in Los Angeles are like this. Unless you’re a lesbian, it isn’t a great feeling. So if you are looking for a relationship, why would you want to live in a place where the gender composition is like a crap party? My first reaction was that a single woman who does not want to remain single should avoid the majority of cities on the list. Except… if you compare the two lists, it isn’t quite that simple.

First of all, there are several cities that overlap. Los Angeles, New York, DC and Chicago are on both lists, so that’s sort of a wash. Really, it makes sense that these cities would have the most single women and the most single men. These are very urban places that both men and women move to in order to pursue their careers. Not the folks who are looking to settle down and make babies in their mid 20’s. In my experience, NY and LA men don’t even start to think about settling down until their mid to late 30’s.

Having lived (and dated) in both New York and Los Angeles, I can say for sure that these are tough dating towns. But looking at these numbers, the other cities on the ‘Top Cities for Single Women’ list might be even worse, because presumably the single women outnumber the single men. As if I needed another reason not to want to live in Las Vegas.

Of course, there are a great many women living in these cities who enjoying their singlehood, and aren’t looking to settle down. If you like your freedom, or enjoy causal dating, I’m sure these cities are a blast; great restaurants to try, art gallery openings to attend, the best fashion money can buy, and tons of great female friends to share it all.

But if you’re a woman who’s looking for a relationship, here are a few cities you may want to avoid:

  • San Jose
  • Las Vegas
  • Denver
  • Austin
  • Seattle
  • Phoenix

And here are the cities with the most available men:

  • Houston
  • San Antonio
  • Miami
  • New Orleans
  • Philadelphia
  • Baltimore

I have to admit, I like a lot of the ‘single women’ cities better than I do the ‘single men’ cities. But New Orleans is awesome. And I have a soft spot for Philly. Could be worse. Of course, love can be found anywhere. And really, moving to a city just because the statistics say it has the most single men is probably a terrible idea. Much better to live where you want to live because, well, you have to live there, and also because you’re more likely to find a guy who shares your tastes and values.

In the end, even for the most marriage-minded of women, the goal should never be to find a guy. The goal should always be to find the right guy.


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