We dated the Zeros… so you don’t have to.

01
February

HELP – So Confused!

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Dear Zeros Before the One,

I met a guy at a bar.  He was super hot, cool, funny.  I really liked him. All was going great. We went out, well, hung out once. He’s texted a lot since then but now I feel like he’s playing games? Why do I always attract this type of guy? What is wrong with me?

Lisa

Let me first say that the only thing wrong with you is not yet being able to see a Zero when you see one. Or are texted by one.

Let’s start with some red flags. A hot guy at a bar is a good thing, but as he is in a bar (and while there are tons of great guys in bars, one should always keep in mind that bars are the natural habitat of a lot of Zeros) you should reserve the “I really liked him” sorts of feelings for a more real non-bar interaction.

“We hung out,” is also a read flag. If you are over the age of 22 and you meet someone you are interested in, try to minimize the ‘hanging out’ and maximize the ‘going out’. If you’ve hung out once and then gotten nothing but texts since, this guy is giving you every clue as to his zeroishness. You wouldn’t be the first girl to let some hotness get in the way of common sense.  Nor the thousandth.

Here’s my diagnosis: he’s probably a Virtual Man (see sample chapter). You’ve had one good interaction followed by lots of text, and not much more.  Here’s the trick to know for sure: text ‘call me’ and if he doesn’t, then it’s pretty clear he’s only interested in having a relationship with his phone company.  As for you blaming yourself because this guy has a dash of the douche, that is ridiculous.  You didn’t cause his Zeroishness. Just make sure you don’t indulge in it. One of the most important words when it comes to dating is ‘Next’.  Don’t waste your time on some guy you hardly know. There are too many real men out there to waste time on a Virtual one.

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