What’s Your Valued Holiday Tradition?+comment
Having a stupid fight with your significant other isn’t new. We will all do it at some point. Don’t even ask me about the time I was screaming at my boyfriend to “Verify me!” after my hotel key wouldn’t work and a poor, hotel employee needed “verification” to let me in since my name wasn’t on the room. Add 30 minutes of banging on the door, calling and texting my boyfriend and trying to wake him while he slept inside the hotel room – and you may understand the silliness of the fight that ensued.
Sometimes a fight is a sign of deep problems in the relationship, which we’ve discussed when Megan and an ex got in a fight about sharks. But sometimes it’s just the normal navigation of a relationship. You aren’t fighting as much as disagreeing – and while it may seem petty – I’ve learned that seemingly small, petty, things are deeply ingrained in us all, and when someone calls it into question, you’ll be surprised how defensive you can get.
Take Thanksgiving. Whether we realize or not, the way in which our family ran Thanksgiving when we were kids, is pretty much how we run things when we grow up. Did your mom always just use the cranberries out of the can, with the can ridges still on it? Mark my words, that’s what you’ll do as an adult. Did your mom go crazy decorating the house with cornucopias, specific Thanksgiving placemats and napkin holders? Then that’s what you’ll most likely want to do too. Most of these decisions are simple and an easy conversation of, “we always did xyz” will be met by most guys with “yeah, whatever.” Since it’s more common for women to do the cooking and cleaning (not always of course – men that do the majority of cooking and cleaning are highly valued and should discuss their awesomeness with their friends and influence other men to be just like them) in a relationship, women are more than likely bringing their family and childhood favorites into play during the holidays. But we all have our preferences.
So it’s with somewhat fascination and a little frustration that I’m learning that as much as I love my boyfriend, there are just some things we’ll never see eye-to-eye on. While we both come from strong, traditional values like you open presents on Christmas Day and not on Christmas Eve. And more importantly, we both agree on real Christmas trees with the more personal, fun, homemade and memorable the ornament the better. Some people are part of the perfect Christmas tree group – where the tree has a color scheme,a general theme, and perfect, Crate N Barrel ornaments – I’m part of the homey, goofy Christmas tree people. And I fully admit that I’m one of those overly-happy-Christmas people. I like the music, the lights, the decorations, midnight mass, the traditions, nativity sets, themed Christmas light neighborhoods, you get the idea. When it comes to this time of the year, yeah, I’m annoying. I get giddy at the thought of picking out our new Christmas tree. And I realize this is written from my Christian, Christmas-loving upbringing, and there are tons of different religions, beliefs, and even animosity towards the holidays in general. So I apologize for my pro-Christmas stance if this much discussion has already bored you.
While I think I’m open to new Christmas ideas and family traditions, there is just one area I won’t budge. In fact, neither one of us will budge. Comments like “so basically you want to ruin Christmas” are being thrown out. So I’m asking our awesome readers to answer this very serious issue. I’m interested to see what wins because we have yet to make our final decision. So tell me…