Worst Dating Book & Advice EVER+comment
Last year, Princeton alum Susan Patton wrote a letter to her alumni’s paper pretty much telling women that universities are for finding a man. It got crazy publicity because its content was so shocking and demoralizing to women, especially those at Princeton. Sadly, controversy and its inherent publicity bring book deals like moths to a flame. So now we have Marry Smart on book shelves. Since Patton had to write more than a letter, her advice to women is both shocking, horrible and beyond insulting. She even includes the cow/milk saying because she apparently lives in 1962.
Patton doesn’t have daughters (thank God or they’d have so many issues, including an eating disorder and an addiction to plastic surgery). She repeatedly reminds women that they will never have as many bright, smart, ambitious men in their vicinity as they do at top universities – so finding a husband should be women’s absolute TOP priority in college if they want kids. Patton obviously hasn’t been to a fraternity party lately, or met the thousands of stoners and dropouts that also frequent university campuses. She endorses teenagers getting plastic surgery or whatever “surgical intervention” they need to be at their best in college, she pretty much blame women for rape if alcohol is involved and much, much more.
Apparently to Patton, an education, maturing, discovering yourself and your interests, meeting other people, developing friendships, and launching a successful and fulfilling career are not priorities, just finding a dude. I think this woman is delusional, should talk to the past Betty Drapers of the world and see how that worked out for them and her entire book makes me continuously vomit up in my mouth.
Just to be clear, Megan and I have been writing advice to women (and men) about dating, advice, marriage, relationships, etc. for years. We also did NOT marry anyone we dated in college. In fact, the thought of marrying the men we dated at 20 is both hilarious and frightening to us. We both married in our thirties (yes Susan, we actually met intelligent men who value our intelligence as well past the age of 30) and are starting families. Neither of us turned into Ms. Havisham or alone with 3 cats because we enjoyed our 20’s. I’m praying this book sells about 10 copies total and Patton bought them all herself, but just in case you’re curious, here are some of her “best” nuggets to those young ladies out there.
Marry Smart Suggestions:
“When she enters college, your daughter will never again be as young, as beautiful, as attractive to men, or as fertile. Encourage her to make the best use of this time.”
“Until you find a spouse, I would advise you invest your effort and energy at least 75 percent in searching for a partner and 25 percent in professional development.”
“If you are too drunk to speak, then you may be incapable of saying no or warding off unwanted advances. And then it’s all on you.”
“If you’ve struggled with obesity through most of your teen years, then maybe surgical intervention is a good idea for you […] If you’re going to go the route of cosmetic surgery, do it early enough to feel comfortable in your new body before going away to school.”